Self-help book

I have just realised that there is a self-help book on my bookshelf. As a person who independently prefers to sort out my personal, emotional issues, this revelation came as a complete surprise. The self-help book that I am mentioning is about helping people to fix their heartbreak. “There will come a time when any relationship comes to an end and if you cannot deal with that bitter ending on your own, why don’t you turn to someone or something for help. Poring over one particular type of book might guide your way out of this misery. Altenatively, why don’t you just swallow a glass of formalin to end the pain!” The last sentence is a joke, in case you might not know it.

A few years ago, a female friend of mine who is quite a bit older than me had just been dumped by a foreign guy. Not knowing what to do to make herself feel better, she emailed me and asked for help. She was in such a state; she said that she wanted someone who she was able to confide in and that person happened to be me. I did not particularly feel privileged about being that someone for her. Even so, I still prepared to hear the wailing of her pain; and at that time the two of us were living in two far different countries. As expected, I had to listen to her asking those many classic questions of a heartbroken person; the ones that begin with what, when, why and how. it was such an unbearable task for someone like me since I am not a woman. I could not imagine what normally women are going through when their love turns sour. The only thing I could do was to just listen to her wrecked love story.

A few days later while I was walking past a bookstore, I decided to drop by to look for a book that might help to tackle the pain of her heartbreak. I found one and decided to buy it, especially for this occasion. While queuing to pay for the book, I felt a tad embarrassed as the front cover of the book was rather colourful and girly. It just did not really suit my image.

Initially, I intended to send the book to her, but I decided against the idea. I thought she could have difficulty understanding some of its details. Therefore, I decided to skim through the book and explain to her about some of the useful infomation in Thai.

That was a long while ago and I came across this self-help book again, leaning neatly next to my other bindings. I have been thinking to myself what is the use of it for me. Why did I buy it in the first place? I am intrigued.

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4 Comments

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4 responses to “Self-help book

  1. Pingback: Self-help book

  2. lizzieb56

    It sounds like you knew why you bought it — but now you’re wondering why it suddenly “reappeared” to you. I say, read through it and see if anything speaks to you. One book that has recently “spoken” to me is also a self-help book (and like you, such books are not on my nightstand normally). It’s “The Woman’s Field Guide to Exceptional Living,” and it’s really helped me make some sense out of my current life, which has been feeling out of control and somewhat dissatisfying. It’s helped me realize I should take responsibility for creating my own exceptional, meaningful life.

  3. lizzieb56

    Sorry — I just realized I could include a link or URL! Here you go: http://www.womansfieldguide.com

    Enjoy, and be inspired.

  4. To lizzieb56,

    Thank you for your comment and your useful link. Did you realise that I am a man, right? The reason that I bought the book at that time was that I did not want to express my careless opinion about the wrecked love of my female friend. Instead of just listening to her crying in pain, I thought it might be good to find something that may help me to talk and distract her out of doing, thinking and behaving stupidly. Since then I did not pay attention to the book until recently. I don’t know how people in your country deal with their painful experiences, but in my country people tend to talk to people that they know, without consulting a psychiatrist, a career that rarely sees the light of day in my country. That’s why my friend contacted me. At that time, I knew that this friend of mine was aware of how to deal with the issue but I think she wanted to talk. That is what friends and family are for.

    Maybe, one day if I have no one to turn to, I might read this kind of book; though I prefer discussing my problem with F&F to reading the book as they can open their arms to comfort me when I feel down about something in life. But I just get on with it as I think of it as an experience, albeit it could be really bad, and that is just life.

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